im sorry I needed to do this

“So you see,” said the Royal Advisor, a rather greasy mouse-looking man, wringing his hands, “The curse states the princess will die on the night before her twenty-fifth birthday-“

“Hold up,” said the beautiful princess, who unfortunately lacked the ability to keep her mouth shut, tucking a silky golden lock behind her ear. “ON the night before-“

The Royal Advisor nodded grimly.

“So what you’re saying is that, until that one specific date, I’m effectively immortal?”

“Technically yes, but then…” The wise old King stammered, flustered for the first time in a long time.

“Wow,” said the princess who was sixteen and did not possess amazing impulse control, “I’m gonna go teach myself how to juggle chainsaws while hang gliding over shark-infested waters, catch you chuckle nuts later.”

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